Dating with kids advice

It’s very common for guys with kids to write in their profiles: “My kids come first,” or “My daughter is the center of my world! You want a potential mate to know that your life includes the giant presence of a kid or four. Plus, if you’ve gone through divorce or another crisis that landed you as a single parent, you are no doubt concerned about giving your kids extra care and sense of security. But it is even trickier if one or both of the parents put the kids before their partner.You also want women to know you’re a devoted dad (it’s no secret chicks get hot for guys who are great with kids! It’s no surprise that so many blended families I know struggle with adjusting all parties to a home where everyone is suddenly expected to revolve around the new relationship. One dad I went out with nearly boasted when telling me about a four-month relationship that went sour because his girlfriend did not understand why he’d abruptly leave in the middle of dinner because his tween son would call, upset about some matter with his hockey coach.One of the best places to meet a good man is to go where he is doing what he loves.For example, sign up for a book club, wine club, yoga class, outdoors adventure club, movie club, or join a church or spirituality group or political activism group. Go to conferences with common themes of interest to older people – AARP Life 50 events, for example.Ultimately, failure to put their partner first was a sign these guys were not ready for a serious relationship, or at least not with those particular women, and that is totally normal.

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Most single guys are like you – they have a lot of different things in life to keep them busy, whether that’s work or family, grandkids, pets, hobbies or other interests. Don’t assume that you won’t have anything in common with men your age.

Or volunteer in your community for a favorite cause.

Often the best way to meet new friends is to start by sharing a common interest and learning from each other. The most appealing older men aren’t stuck at home – they are often travelling and doing things they love in places they love.

Stop putting kids first Imagine a relationship that centers on the two of you, and all the stability and care your kids will take from that.

Accept that a truly wonderful relationship only multiplies the love available to your kids — not robs them of some of yours.

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