Most first dates didn’t make it to a second one, and the whole thing seemed like a waste of everyone’s time. It wasn’t far out of town, and only overnight, but I hadn’t had the means or energy to travel out of town in almost two years. Two days before we planned to leave, I looked over at my toddler eating lunch and saw the tell-tale signs of pink eye. Considering the friends with benefits option after the babysitter fiasco seems like I’m setting myself up for failure. I can say “I don’t want a relationship” with more truth to back it up.
So, I’ll accept my friend’s offer, and be friends with benefits, except ones like hope or expectation.
2017 estimates say that single mothers lead around 7.76% of all American households,¹ meaning that there are literally millions of single moms across America.
Dating became a distraction from my daily life, an escape from my full plate of responsibilities. He didn’t have kids and didn’t understand the sinking devastation I felt. “It’s nice to have someone who will have sex with you and not be a jerk, yet not have any expectations or all the emotional stuff.” He had a point.
Even with my friends’ willingness to help out with child care, every night out was a scramble to set up who could watch my kids and when I had to be home by their bedtime. My older daughter was away for a few days after Christmas, and he asked me to go out of town with him. I needed so desperately to get a break from my day-to-day life of working at home. “I gave him an out,” I said to my friend a couple of days later while wallowing through the sixth season of “Parenthood.” “Why did you give him an out? I wanted to escape for an hour or two in between some flirty distractions without worrying about whether he’ll be a supportive, healthy, future partner. I had two very real kids at home who came first, took up most of my time and energy, and I didn’t have much to give.
"From firsthand experience, I can tell you that we can't wait to dress up and feel sexy," said Strada.
"Since we have little ones hanging on us all the time and have to constantly be in responsible mommy mode, dates are an opportunity to let our hair down and let loose." A single mom with a divorce behind her has probably done some soul searching to figure out went wrong in her marriage-- including the part she played in its breakdown.